Reparenting your inner child is about actively giving yourself what was missing as a child. It’s about recognising patterns rooted in your childhood, then developing self-compassionate ways to meet your own needs so that you change habits of reacting
Core need
So, you can ask your inner child, what does she absolutely want, what’s her core need. Your first thought might be that she wants to be loved, however if you love her, she must love you back…and she may be too angry to do that at first. You might assume she’d like a cuddle, however if she feels ugly she may not want to be cuddled. She might simply want to feel physically safe, she may never have felt safe. Go into your heart, connect with her and ask her what she needs – don’t assume you know. She may simply want acceptance, words of encouragement or you simply being there for her.
If as an adult you come to see that you tend to have a habit of looking for approval, you can teach her that it’s ok to feel how she feels. Feelings need to be honoured and processed in a healthy way. You can learn to validate yourself instead of relying on others to do it for you and so develop integrity.
If you felt unheard as a child, you can practise speaking up for yourself. If your inner child feels unsafe, you can let them know that you are here for them, they are safe now. And when it comes to boundaries, you can let her know them its ok to say ‘no’ and put your needs first, hold her hand as she practices.