Being mentally tough, tough in the sense of not giving up, persisting under pressure, is important in working though any stress or change and it builds resilience.
How do you develop this? Seeing challenges as opportunities, having a mindset that wants to learn and grow, being willing to adapt and take rsiks, helps enormously and builds a stronger sense of self. Developing self awareness, managing your energy and learning to respond rather than react is also part of the process. So, when something unexpected smacks you in the face …it’s good to pause, step back, fel whatever you’re feeling, accept its happened, reflect, look at different options, then one step at a time as you go through it all.
You can also watch your self talk, challenge any negative chatter so that it doesn’t control your behaviour. You can sit and feel sorry for yourself, or, look at what is the lesson and what you CAN do. Its good to remind yourself what you’ve done well in the past, and, if you look at things haven’t gone so well, you can focus on what you learned and how you’re going to do things differently next time. Believe you CAN do it! It’s about being optimistic, positive, in a balanced way… not pretending everything is wonderful when it’s not.
Asking for help, being vulnerable doesn’t always come with mental toughness. Yet, we all need connection. Having good relationships with others, support that you can call upon can mean the world to you when it all becomes a bit too much. I remember when I experienced two back-to-back cyclones here in Vanuatu, I was terrified… my mentor and friends were there for me, not in person, but energetically and it meant everything. People want to be there for you, if you don’t ask for help you deny them that.
Keep on keeping on and you find that you bounce back…and… you become more than you thought you were, so much more.